It is always exciting when I come across a piece of simple wisdom. To me simple wisdom is something that is so obvious that it makes you smile that you didn’t put it into words first. As I was rereading a book this week (Close Calls by David Carder), I stumbled upon one of those.
What is this little gem of knowledge?
It is a list of things that keep a relationship vital. Simply put, they are those behaviors that came easy at the beginning, but may fall away as time progresses and life gets busy. According to the book, if we fail to provide these things to our partner, they become vulnerable to people outside of our relationship who might supply them.
Here are five things that Carder says we should continue to do to keep a partner happy.
- Accommodation – When you are first dating I’ll bet you make sure that you make time and space to accommodate the relationship. You might cancel other commitments and plan your life around being able to connect with your girl or guy. They are a priority in your life and they know it.
- Adoration – Isn’t it a great feeling to feel beautiful or handsome when your beloved looks at you – that they would rather be with you than anyone else? You spend extra effort making sure that you are worthy of the attention – and you melt when they respond positively.
- Admiration – Who doesn’t want to be looked up to? When I feel that from Nan, it makes me want to go the extra mile. It’s not easy being great, but when someone recognizes it in you it makes you want to hang around them more.
- Affirmation – For some folks there is no substitute for delicious words spoken to them. They light up when you tell them all the things that you love and appreciate about them – or how you respect what they do or who they are as a person.
- Affection – Physical connection is something that all living beings crave. It is why it is so hard to keep our hands off our partner when we are dating. It is a definite way to reassure your partner that you still love and care for them even after a lot of time has passed.
Have you gotten lazy in your relationship? I know I have and this is a great reminder.