Today I sit here unmotivated to write – despite a pretty strong commitment to get something out each week. It’s not because I don’t care or that I think what I write is not all that important – that’s for my readers to determine.
What holds me back is a confluence of things that distract me from focusing. There has been the death of a close family member, some challenges in our business, other family members not doing so well, and a lack of sleep. Those, along with the normal stresses of life have had a draining effect today.
And yet, here I sit writing anyway.
Maybe you can relate. If you are a mother, hungry kids don’t have a lot of empathy for your lack of motivation to feed them. The same thing goes for employers who have a job that needs you in it, or a spouse that depends on you to make it through the day. What makes the difference between giving up, giving in and giving out?
For me, some days it’s just pure determination.
I may feel one way, but I behave differently. And it isn’t just all feelings. I don’t just feel tired – I am tired. I don’t just feel grief – I am grieving. And yet I have an inner strength to call on – a belief that what I need to do is possible.
Where does this inner strength come from? As a believer in Jesus Christ I cling to the words the apostle Paul spoke to the Philippians.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (4:13)
That is a bold statement for a doubter like me to accept. I certainly don’t feel like I can do anything that is required of me. But I think I don’t always assess accurately what is required of me. Sometimes it’s not fixing – but enduring, or suffering without complaint (not saying what I want to say.) Other times it is facing fears – showing up and not running, or taking responsibility and not shifting the blame.
All of this takes determination. Perseverance. Grit.
But at least we don’t have to do it alone.